Adjusting to life with a new baby: 15 practical tips

1. Relax, rest, recover

Giving birth is a huge physical and emotional event. Allowing time for rest and recovery is important for physical and mental health.

The early weeks can be a time to rest and bond with the baby or babies.

For some people, relaxing means sleep, while for others it will be a different activity. Anything the mother or birthing person, or co-parent finds restful is worth trying.

2. Sleep

Many parents find sleep deprivation a huge challenge. The saying ‘sleep while the baby sleeps’ can feel irritating when there’s no way to tell if the baby will sleep for 5 minutes or an hour. However, even ‘snacking’ on short naps may help.

Our article on newborn and baby sleep has tips to cope with being woken frequently at night. Some parents find themselves co-sleeping or bed sharing with their baby intentionally or because it just happens. There are safety guidelines to be aware of if doing this.

3. Communicate and be a team

Where there is a partner, parents can lean on each other for help and support.

It’s common for relationships to shift after having a baby, and each parent might do things differently. It’s good for parents to keep talking about how they're feeling, what they need, and understand the reasons the other person is doing things a certain way. Communication can help keep bonds strong in those early days.

Parents who are alone for whatever reason may be able to reach out to friends and family for help and support. Friends who are also parents, like NCT friends, can share all the highs and lows of parenthood.

4. Managing visitors

It’s okay to keep visits few and short. In the early weeks some parents put a sign on the door thanking visitors for their good wishes and saying that they’re trying to get some sleep so won’t be responding to unexpected callers. A similar message could go on social media, or as a voicemail message on the phone.

Parents don’t have to give visitors the baby to cuddle. Instead, visitors could make their own tea, wash up the dishes, or hang a load of laundry.

Many parents want to be independent, but it may make things feel a bit easier if you’re able to accept help and support from trusted people. It’s also ok to maintain healthy boundaries on what you’re willing for people to do.

5. Surround yourself with a support network

The saying ‘it takes a village to raise a child’ is a reminder that a network of support is particularly valuable in this period of adjustment.

That network may include a partner or family and friends. It may also be the midwife, health visitor, and GP. Over the first year, it may extend to new parents from parent and baby groups, childcare settings or NCT-led groups.

6. Healthy eating

Nourishing, healthy food helps recovery from birth.

Some people may have stocked up with food before the baby arrives. After the baby is born, cooking meals which will last more than one day could help reduce the load.

New parents can also suggest visitors bring meals or snacks rather than gifts for the baby. Alternatively, a slow cooker might be a useful gift for the family.

7. Feeding the baby

However you’re feeding your baby, it can take a surprising amount of time. Babies need to feed at least 8-12 times in 24 hours. It can help to get comfortable with a drink, a snack and a book or your phone before starting so there’s no sense of rush.

We have articles on all types of feeding. When formula feeding the guidance is to make each feed when needed. Parents may be tempted to save time by making it in batches, but this isn’t as safe for the baby. Read how to safely make up infant formula.

Our Infant Feeding line provides free, confidential support from trained NCT Breastfeeding Counsellors. It's open every day, from 8am to midnight. Call 0300 330 0700. We also have information on local feeding support across the UK.

8. Simplify your life

Keep things like nappies and changing kit where the baby is likely to be. If living over more than one storey, this can mean both upstairs and downstairs.

This makes it easier when the parent is on their own with the baby or if they’re recovering from a more complicated birth.

9. Protect mental wellbeing

It’s important for parents to keep an eye on their own mental health, and that of any partner. It’s common to have good and bad days, and sharing these with a support network can help everyone recognise the ups and downs.

Someone who has had a more complicated or premature birth might find it unhelpful to compare how they’re coping with someone who is in a more straightforward situation. And some parents may be grieving not having their own parent or a partner around to support them.

If it feels like there are more bad days than good days, then it’s important to reach out for support. This might be to a partner, relatives or friends. And the midwife, health visitor or GP are also there for support.

Our articles on perinatal depression or recovering from a traumatic birth might be helpful.

10. Meet other parents

Becoming a parent can feel lonely and can have an impact on mental health (MIND, 2023).

While it can feel hard at first to leave the house with a newborn, it is an opportunity to have a change of scenery and possibly some fresh air.

Parents can find out what’s happening at the local NCT branch or ask the health visitor about local parent and baby groups. Meeting other parents who are at the same stage of life can help parents feel less alone. If the first group doesn’t feel comfortable, try another.

11. Do something for yourself

As they move through the period of adjustment, parents may start thinking about taking some time for themselves. It might be a walk, a haircut, some exercise, or meeting a friend.

Remember that looking after yourself isn’t an indulgence but an investment in mental health.

12. Exercise

Gentle exercise like walking can boost mood and aid recovery.

13. What are the priorities

In the early days it may feel like everything takes longer than expected, which can be frustrating when there seems to be a never-ending to-do list.

Some people find it helpful to write down everything that’s on their mind. Then they can decide what really needs doing and what can wait. Just writing the list can help get some perspective. It can also help to identify which tasks can be done by someone else, whether that’s a partner, grandparent or friend.

14. Try a baby sling

Using a sling can be calming for the baby. It’s also good for their brain development as the parent may be more likely to talk to them. Parents might find it frees up their hands, and it means the baby spends less time on their back.

15. Stay informed

This early period can feel intense, but it doesn’t last more than a few months. Making use of information from NCT helps parents feel more confident of their ability to cope. Our article Helping a newborn transition to life outside the womb is a good place to start, as well as all our other pregnancy and parent information on our website.

If the baby hasn’t been born yet, then making a postnatal plan can help prepare for the early weeks.